Chapter 4
Engagement Etiquette
In October 2017, Mike asked me to marry him. After 18 years, it was, I can tell you, a bit of a shock. Not only did he ask me to marry him, but he got down on one knee to ask, which was an even bigger shock. And after falling about laughing, and helping him back up, we went out that very same weekend and bought our engagement ring.
Your engagement is where it all begins. The moment he got down on one knee, or simply popped the question. With so many women choosing to propose today, it could so easily be a woman and of course with same sex marriage becoming part of contemporary life, it speaks for itself.
It’s important to see your engagement as the start of your dream wedding.
This is a very special time in both your lives and should be treated as such. Even if you hadn’t thought about using a wedding planner, which in this case is a type of journal I would urge you to think about keeping one now. Recording your journey to your wedding day will help keep those memories strong and on reading catapult you back into a time much of which you may simply have forgotten. Trust me, you will be glad you did. Using a wedding planner can be so much more than simply making notes, it can include pictures, images, photographs, business cards and those special moments just the two of you shared.
When you are planning your engagement, whatever you decide to do wallow in the moment and spend a little time getting used to the idea you are soon to be married. Allow this time to sink in, before rushing off and telling everyone. Even if it’s just for a few hours. After all, it’s not every day someone asks you for your hand in marriage. With time soon being taken over by talk of weddings, guest lists, venues and wedding dresses until your head is in a complete whirl; you will be glad you made those first few hours after the proposal a time for just the two of you. Why not celebrate? book a weekend away, spend some time at a local spa, or simply spend some quality time together.
Choosing and buying your engagement ring should be a special occasion for you both. Keep an eye on the weather, trudging around jewellers in the freezing cold or when it’s pouring down, is probably not your idea of fun, even if you are choosing your engagement ring. You want it to be unforgettable for the right reasons.
Make a day of it, book a nice lunch, dress for the weather and look the best you can. Make sure your hands and nails are beautiful. I had a manicure and shellac nails when we went to choose our engagement ring My hands looked so much nicer with smart hands and nails, rather than chewed fingernails, wicklow’s and chipped nail varnish. Use hand creams frequently and have a regular manicure, even if you have to learn how to do it yourself. Having beautiful hands and nails takes time to create. So, take that time. You will be pleased you did. Beautiful nails also help stop you going for the biscuit tin. I promise you, it does.
When you are ready, you might want to arrange a small gathering of key friends and family members. No need to break the bank for an engagement party, unless you really want to. It will also give you an opportunity to look at photographers, cake and card designers.
Remember it’s bad form not to invite those you invited to your engagement party to your wedding, but as we all know, friends and family dynamics do change.
